By Sheryl Kurland Theoretically, its a holly, jolly time of year, but in reality, the holiday season is a catalyst for rocky marriages. Historically, January is the month with the highest divorce rate. Having endured decades of family feasts, party roulette, spending schizophrenia, shopping marathons, and obligation overload, couples married over 50 years hold the proven formula to marital bliss during the holidays. Espousing experience over analysis, they share their advice: Holiday Marriage Survival Tips Never discuss sensitive subjects when youre hungry. Make a list of what not to talk about at family gatherings. For example, never use the word older, as in Aunt Mary is older than Aunt Susan or For an older man, Uncle Harold has a lot of hair. Also, never compare today with the good ol days. If there are two ways to interpret what somebody said and one makes you mad and the other doesnt, pick the other one. At family dinners, if youve lost weight recently, dont mention it. In fact, wear baggy clothes to make yourself inconspicuous. Never roll your eyes or shush someones annoying child running around or whining. Take a vacation, i.e., go on a cruise, stay at a bed & breakfast. (If some relatives are insulted by your plan, theyre probably the same ones that made you miserable!) Consolidate tasks. Example: Take a nap together. This allows you to accomplish two goals simultaneously: 1) Devote time solely to each other, and 2) Prevent exhaustion. Make dreaded tasks more enjoyable. Example: Chat on the phone while wrapping presents or addressing holiday cards. Celebrate somebody elses holiday. Forego the lavish, overindulgent holiday feast and, instead, volunteer at a local church, food bank or homeless shelter to help the less fortunate. If an issue arises, decide how big a deal it really is to the two of you not Aunt Emma or Uncle Lester. Never, ever, miss a good chance to shut up. Every comment doesnt need a retort. Every issue doesnt need another opinion. Speak up when its important. Keep your lips zipped when it isnt. What you dont say is often as important as what you do say. Repel little mishaps and misunderstandings with laughter. Weather turbulence with a sense of humore. Hug and squeeze, aim to please. The holiday pace is frenetic and its easy to lose each other in the shuffle. In the midst of the chaos, dont forget to nurture your relationship. Block out time for each other, just as you do for everyone else! Actions can be as low key as sharing a hug for no particular reason, calling or instant messaging to simply say Im thinking about you, or taking a 15 minute after-dinner walk together. So many parties. So many outfits. So many decisions. The most popular and vexing question of the season spoken from the mouths of babes is Honey does this make me look fat? Ladies, dont ask. And gentlemen, should they dare, dont risk ruining the evening (and the entire next week). The correct answer is to articulate the fifth amendment. Besides, deep down, every wife knows where her curves should and shouldnt be. Holiday get-togethers compel people to brag about their gains. Couples brag about gains in their garage, gains in their wallet, their LLardo collection, childrens trophies, frequent flyer points, and on and on and on. With the realization that your list is a lot shorter, you may inquisitively look into each others eyes and ask: What are we doing wrong? The answer: Absolutely nothing. Whether your accomplishments for 2006 equal one or 100, give yourselves a pat on the back. Love the one youre with. Oh my, there are some fine looking men and women attending the holiday get-togethers. Everybody is jolly. Everyone looks marvelous. These observations can magnify the challenges, problems and issues the two of you are dealing with on the home-front. Are you missing something? Dont be fooled by the razzmatazz. Ninety-nine percent of the time the grass isnt greener on the other side. Instead of wallowing in wonder, turn the energy spent in doubt into energy devoted to rekindling the love between you and your mate. Forget the Norman Rockwell ideal. The pie crust wont be perfect. Scale down your expectations, and focus on whats right rather than whats wrong. Keep a good book handy. An occasional cocktail from time to time helps! Sheryl Kurland is author of the elegant coffee-table book Everlasting Matrimony: Pearls Of Wisdom From Couples Married 50 Years Or More. 75 couples, "real-life" relationship experts, reveal the keys to a loving, lasting and fulfilling relationship. SIGN UP FOR FREE, WEEKLY EMAIL "TIME-TESTED RELATIONSHIP TIPS" FROM COUPLES MARRIED 50-PLUS YEARS AT http://www.EverlastingMatrimony.com. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Sheryl_Kurland http://EzineArticles.com/?Marriage-Tips-For-The-Holidays---Peace-On-Earth...-And-In-Your-Home-Too&id=494241 buy phentermine 30 mg
phentermine no prescription free shipping
cheap phentermine no prescription needed
phentermine overnight without a prescription
